The Battle Of The Desk Rages On

We reorganized the desks in my office. Before, I was off to the side with my desk next to another teacher I work with. Then, it was decided this was a bad idea for reasons which are still unclear to me. So all the desks of the teachers from my grade level were put into one big heap. It think this was a cleverly planned tactic used to get my desk close to everyone else's because my desk is always clean and empty, so the other teachers can use my desk as a work desk. Now every time I come into the office, there is stuff all over my desk: papers, projects, food, and all kinds of nonsense. My next game plan is to fill up my desk with tons of trash, so it can't be used as a storage center. But what should I put on it?

Tha Battle At The Bathtub

Although giving Calvin a bath has become easier, it is still very difficult to wash his hair. He will sit and play in the bathtub by himself for 20 minutes then I will tell him bath time is over. At this time I soap him down and rinse him off and every other day I wash his hair. At the end of every bath when I start to soap him up he looks at me and very seriously tells me, "Daddy no wash my hair.ok?...ok daddy. no wash my hair...OK." His pleas become more desperate the longer I wait to respond. On the days I inform him that I will not wash his hair he is ecstatic but for those unlucky days when I tell him we have to wash his hair he becomes very distraught and when I actually do wash his hair I feel like I am an interrogator performing some kind of water boarding torture. I am sure the neighbors think the same thing when they hear Calvin cry and complain about getting his hair washed but as soon as it's over he is right as rain and ready to go downstairs and watch "Monster Buster Club" ((his TV program) and drink his milk. Anyway the point of the post is that to combat this situation I have purchased a snorkeling mask to avoid any soap or water from getting in his eyes while washing his hair. I have yet to implement the new weapon though because while he will put on the mask in the tub he will not let me wash his hair with it on.

Mechanization

To combat many daily battles I have decided to become mechanized. We purchased a scooter. It is a Honda Activa, and I chose it because it is what all the delivery guys drive and so I assume it will be reliable and it was cheap and also it will sell easily when we leave. The night I got it I drove it about 40 minutes. I was driving through the city, making my way to the highway, feeling so cool on my scooter when I noticed a guy driving in the next lane with a dog on the back of his scooter with its front paws on the guys shoulders. To top it off, the dog was wearing sunglasses and to add insult to injury, it was at night so the stupid dog didn't even need the glasses. To one up this guy I am going to drive around with Calvin on my shoulders and Harrison on his and they will both be wearing sunglasses.

The Hunt For Randle Patrick McMurphy

I love Peanut M&Ms but it seems I have depleted the supply here because they are sold out in all the stores I have checked, so I had my brother ship some out with other important and essential items, like PSP games. I have started an investigation to the disappearance of my nutty and delicious treat. I have come to the conclusion that only one person would be so brazen as to abduct a bag of peanut M&Ms that were immigrating to a new country and he is none other than Randle Patrick McMurphy. To capture such a fiendish villain I have enlisted the help of, you guessed it, Jack Bauer. No doubt I shall have my delicious friends with their hard candy shells adding rich chocolate covering a golden peanut nugget within a fortnight.

War Of The Watches

I have never been successful at owning a watch. I have purchased scores of them over the years but they never last for various reasons. I usually get cheap watches, but about a year ago I got a decent watch and I was out in the rain the other day and the rain got into the watch and broke it. I also bought my wife a watch for Christmas last year and it broke. I bought a watch with a leather strap also last year because I wanted a watch to wear when I was outside hiking around but because I have little girl wrists, it doesn't really fit even though I make it as tight as it will go. I guess I could poke another hole in the strap but that seems so ghetto. I wouldn't even carry a watch if I didn't have this bizarre obsession with knowing what time it is. I bet Jack doesn't have these problems.

Bug Battles

For some reason the bugs live forever out here and it is buggin me out. Just last night I was bit by a masquito. Are you kidding me!!! December and masquitos are still alive. Also there are still flies everwhere. Last year I was successful in winning the war with the ants by spraying two large bottle of insect killer all over the house right before we left for summer break. I don't think that is an option for these troublesome airborne attackers. I will just use the USA tactic for defedning against a nuclear attack and duck and cover.

Note: I will no longer have my wife edit my post because it takes to long so get ready for rushed sloppy reading filled with grammatical mistakes.

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